So go ahead and guess who performed at Rascals comedy club this weekend. Go ahead, guess. More about that later. But first...

Ok, I haven't posted here for a few weeks so let me get you caught up. Two weekends ago, I had the distinct honor of performing for about 200 people. Ok, so it was in Vineland, NJ...but it was still for 200 people. Apparently, girls softball is huge in that area and every year they have this big fund raiser to raise money for the girls to travel to Virginia and compete in a big softball tournament. For $30 a person, they got unlimited beer, a buffet style dinner and an hour and a half long comedy show. All proceeds go to the Wildcats girls softball team. I performed with Jay Black and Mike Siscoe, both of whom friggin' rocked the joint! It was blast to watch both of these guys, especially Mike Siscoe's finale when he let audience's members yell out any country, and he demonstrated what the native people of that country looked like during an orgasm. It was hilarious.

A few weeks ago, my friend Glen Jensen got me a spot at Rascals in Cherry Hill, NJ. I told some people at work about it and some wanted to come. So I was able to talk a total of 6 people into coming out and seeing me. The night that I was to go up was Thursday, March 17th...yes, St. Patrick's Day. So I write a new bit about St. Patrick's Day the day of while in the shower. I ask a few people what they think of the new bit, and they like it. Cool. I will do it that night. Well, that night, I am nervous about this new bit. I am under a time restraint, and still don't know if I should do it. It is an untested bit. I am back in the green room making myself nervous thinking about this new bit. This is like an audition at Rascals, so I don't want to screw it up, but I think that it is a funny bit, and it would be perfect since it is in fact St. Patrick's Day. About 10 minutes before show time I peek out to see how big the crowd is. Is it 100 people? 200 People? How many people will see my big debut? I stick my head out of the door, and I see my buddy Joe and his three friends that he brought. And that is all that I see. The rest of the room is empty. AAACK! Five minutes go by, and two more people I know show up. One more couple shows up before the manager cancels the show. Great, there goes my shot. "How would you like to come back on Saturday for both shows" I hear from the manager. SWEEET!! So I go back on Saturday where the crowds were great. I gave it my all, my St. Patrick's Day bit worked great, even on Saturday, and the manager of the Cherry Hill Rascals recommended me to some other Rascals clubs. Sometimes, I love the way things work out

This weekend, I am performing in two different places in Delaware. Friday night will be with Geno Bisconte and some kick-ass comics he is bringing down with him from NYC. There is no better way for my ego to come down of this high like realizing how much better everyone else is. Sometimes, I hate the way things work out.

 

Posted @ 9:24 pm / Permanent Link

Damn it! My web hosting company suspended my service last night after giving me a bill 5 days before. I had 5 days to pay it. But, it was for the past year because they forgot to bill me for 12 months. 12 months! That is their business. How can you give something to someone for 12 months and forget to charge them? That's like a whore going down on 12 different guys and forgetting to collect the crack rock while wiping him off of her mouth. Sure, even I have forgotten after 2 or 3 "clients" but certainly not 12. Umm, disregard that last comment.

So this past Saturday I performed at a place called the Bent Elbo. A comic named Dan Glammer co-produced the show. I had a fun time their and the room was close to full. This was actually the first show that Dan and his partner have put on there, with many more in the future. It sure makes a guy feel good when you're asked to perform in the premier show for a club. The other comics in the show were Dan Glammer as the MC, Jim Burns, Martha Gay, and Geno Bisconte was the headliner. I love to watch Geno. He comes right out and insults a guy in the front row, but does it in such a way as to not get his ass kicked. Every time I see him I am amazed at how well he takes control of the audience and makes them love him while throwing slapping them in the face. I love every minute of his act.

So I am slowly adding new things to this site. Soon, you will be able to read all of my past ramblings here, instead of just the past 5 entries. I am trying to make everything automatic so that everything gets updated properly when it is supposed to. I love PCP...sorry, PHP.

 

Posted @ 9:32 pm / Permanent Link

This cracked me up. Everyone is raving about Jamie Foxx right now. "He is such a great actor", "He is the best actor of the year", blah blah blah. Mr Foxx has one of the crapiest movies ever thought up coming out this summer called Stealth. When you see the trailer, tell me they didn't just combine Short Circuit and Top Gun and try to pass it off as a summer blockbuster. We will see just how good of an actor Jamie Foxx is when he is promoting this movie and he is trying to convince America that this movie is worth spending two hours and $10 a person. He would have been better off just signing on to do "Ray 2: I Still Can't See Shit". Also, listen for the AOL guy to make his feature debut in the trailer saying "Good Bye". You'll get the reference when you see the trailer.

 

Posted @ 11:07 pm / Permanent Link

I got tired of the layout of my website so I changed it just enough to feel like it was different. Kind of like moving your dresser to the left by a foot and feeling you have a whole new room. Well, maybe not. Anyway, I took down the front page where you fine folks could choose between a Flash version or HTML version of my site. Now, I just give you the HTML version and let you decide if you want the Flash version by clicking the link at the bottom of each page. I might just do away with the flash version all together. I haven't decided yet. I'm sure you all are on pins and needles, quivering with anticipation, awaiting my decision. Well, I have come to a decision...and my decision is... to think about it a bit longer.

So this past weekend's shows went fairly well. I was booked in the fine towns of Skippack and Audubon, Pennsylvania! Actually, it was with Chuckles, the clubs that I started out performing in. Friday's show was on track to being a crappy show. At show time, there were about 12 people in the room, and they were all pretty quiet. Suddenly, a group of 8 or 9 lively people came walking in. Thank the comedy Gods for them, because they came ready to laugh and helped the rest of the audience get in the laughing mood as well.

Saturday's first show was packed. Sold out. Standing room only. Sweeeet. That was a great show, until one of the comics got booed and yelled at by an audience member. BOOOO!! YOU SUCK!!! GET OFF STAGE!!! I felt bad for the comic because no matter what you say back, you still got booed at. The comic wrapped up and got off stage. The audience was a bit unruly at first, but came back around and really enjoyed the other acts, including the headliner Glen Jensen.

The second show, which takes place about 20 minutes away in a different club, was not packed by any means. The room holds about 80 people, and there were about 14 scattered mostly along the back wall. Towards the end of the show, they came around, but it wasn't the best way to end the three shows. You do find out very odd things when you are playing to a small audience. For instance, one woman complained because her husband apparently yells out her sister's name during sex. That same woman also holds a patent on a salad dressing. Who the hell knew that you could patent a salad dressing?

So I am doing a show tomorrow (Wednesday) for a private party with a few of my comedy buddies. I think that they are a bunch of salesmen or something. It would probably help if I knew that. Then I was asked to perform at a new club just getting started. In fact, it is their premier show. Quite an honor that I was asked to do it. With all the crappy comics in Philly, they picked me. Quite an honor indeed. More about it after the show. It could go good (lots of promotion and the first show at this club) or bad (not much promotion until they see how the show goes). It is in a bar/restaurant, so we will see. Seacrest out!

Just for the record...I HATE SNOW!

 

Posted @ 11:00 pm / Permanent Link